A celebrity literally hits the bricks on Tuesday’s SAS Australia in a horror accident that manages to one-up confronting scenes where everyone candidly compares how grotty their jocks are.
Think that’s an exaggeration? You’re mistaken. We’re not fibbers – unlike one of the celebrities in the military camp.
Tonight, they come clean about the web of lies they’ve been spinning. And it’s almost as toxic as the aforementioned jocks.
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“I’m still wearing the same underwear I wore when I arrived here,” that chick Zima from Neighbours declares.
It has been seven days.
“If you wanna wear the same undies, (just) chuck a pad (in),” she tells her co-stars. “I don’t feel too gross yet.”
Rugby player Mahalia Murphy takes a moment to consider the hot tip.
“But I have a G-string, so …” she says.
This kind of beautiful intimacy continues to flourish as the celebs prepare for the day. Standing at the water trough while brushing his teeth, Matthew Mitcham lets one rip.
“That was a long one,” he remarks as the sound echoes around the campsite. “I thought we were under shellfire again.”
Zima smiles joyously.
“Thank god for farts,” she muses.
It’s thrilling to know all local scripted free-to-air dramas have been killed off just so we can see interactions like this play out in prime-time.
The past few days have been tough for Zima but she seems to regain her confidence in the first challenge of the episode. She successfully gets to the end of the task, only to fall at the last hurdle. Or, more accurately ... fall off a tower and onto the concrete pavement.
Poised to jump from a high platform and into the ocean, she takes the leap – but the cameras cut away. We hear her smack onto the ground. Then comes the bloodcurdling scream. Producers run over. Ambulance sirens screech. The challenge is cancelled and Zima is hospitalised — withdrawn from the show with a fractured wrist. The shock commotion rivals Matthew Mitcham’s morning shellfire.
Not wanting anymore celebrities to go ka-splat, the soldiers decide to keep everyone grounded with some indoor activities. The challenge? Write your most shameful secret in a letter and read it aloud. Matthew Mitcham provides the biggest shock when it’s revealed he has been spinning a web of lies that’s as twisted as Zima’s threadbare week-old underwear.
“I’ve been a really selfish person in relationships,” he tells the group.
“I feel so ashamed for the immense hurt that I caused someone for 11 years who stayed with me for all throughout my entire addiction. And despite being several years clean and sober and it being one of his absolute deal-breakers, I still struggle to be completely honest with my husband. So the thing I’m most ashamed to admit today is I hurt the people who are most important to me because honesty is not one of my core values and I’m a liar. I struggle to tell the truth when it’s difficult.”
What is he lying about? There’s only one person we can trust to get the answer — our favourite gossip girl, Ant Middleton.
“What’s the latest lie that’s eating you up?” Ant asks after dragging the Olympic diver into an interrogation cell.
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Matthew tears up.
“Sexual behaviour ... outside the relationship,” he replies. “Which is ridiculous because my partner and I have an understanding and yet I still have so much shame about it but I can’t be honest with it. So, there’s no reason to lie about it and that’s what eats me up. Because of my own shame.”
There’s actually a glimmer of hope here that Matthew needs to see and celebrate. At the beginning of the episode, he could’ve lied and blamed his fart on Tim Robards. But he didn’t. And that’s progress.
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